I know that is the name of a movie coming out, but today its how I feel about myself.
I say this with a little bit of jest, but also kind of truthfully:) Here's why.
Lately I have been extremely anxious to find out what this little baby inside of me is. BOY OR GIRL??? I really want to know. Every time some one asks me how far along I am I pretty much know that the next question is "Do you know what you're having?"
I think the closer I get to finding out the more and more anxious I will be. It's not like I'm losing sleep over this or anything, I just want to find out SOON because I want to start thinking of names and making baby stuff and trying to think of a way to decorate the nursery.
A few girls at church have mentioned that they were able to get free ultrasounds at the local crisis pregnancy center and found out early the gender of their baby. I have been told that they occasionally need pregnant women to practice the ultrasounds on. (I don't know maybe for training newbies or something) So I thought I'd give it a shot. Thankfully I called first.
When I called the lady who answered said she had never heard of them doing "practice" ultrasounds. She said that if I needed to come in and have a free pregancy test I could do that and then if there was any question as to how far along I was, they'd do an ultrasound. I thanked her and said I had just been curious and that was all.
She then probably thought I was some middle school girl who got pregnant by her boyfriend and was afraid to tell people and was now just backing out of it. She proceeded to ask me if I knew that I was pregnant and if so how far along. I told her I was 16 1/2 weeks. She then asked if I had a Dr. I do. She asked if I had any reason to believe there was something wrong with the pregnancy.... I felt awful at this point and just wanted to tell her "No I have a good dr. I'm sure I'm pregnant and have no reason to believe anything is abnormal with my pregnancy. I just wanted to use your great services to find out a little early what the gender of my baby is. I know I'm dispicable. I'm sorry. I'll never do it again. I'll wait another month and just find out at my dr apt."
On a happier note, I have been feeling the baby more:)